How God Defines Beauty

Recently I was taking pictures with a friend of mine. After our selfies, my friends started to tear herself apart for everything she didn’t like about herself in the photo.

As she continued, I had to intervene, look her in the eyes and tell her to stop.

“You’re beautiful”, I told her. “You are fearfully and wonderfully made… there is no flaw in you. Don’t start comparing yourself to other girls, because guess what, every girl has things about themselves they don’t like. Choose to be confident, and choose to believe what God says about you as truth. “

She thanked me as we walked away from this moment.

A few days went by.  This time I was taking some pictures with my husband. At the end of this, guess what I started to do? Yep, tear myself apart, focusing on everything I saw as a “flaw”. And then it hit me- wow- I just told my friend to knock it off when it came to this, and here I am doing the exact thing I told her not to do.

I’m still learning to catch myself before I go down that dark, deep hole of comparison, envy, and jealously. But in this moment I’m thankful I did just that. I made a choice to stop listening to the lies and turn to God’s truth and remind myself what God says about womanhood and how He defines beauty.

1 Peter 3:3-4 “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. 4 Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.

Proverbs 31:30 “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”

This is how God defines beauty for a woman, one whose heart belongs to him. Now, do you believe that? Do you believe that the inner self, your heart is what truly characterizes beauty?

We live in a world where girls (and guys) are pressured to chase this standard of perfection that doesn’t exist. With Pinterest, Instagram, and all other social media platforms, we are constantly seeing pictures of “perfection” that feed our comparison and dissatisfaction with what we have been given.

There is nothing wrong with looking nice, doing makeup or doing your favorite hairstyle, but if we think these things will satisfy us, then we have been deceived.

Like the Proverbs writer says, “Beauty is fleeting”.

Our looks and bodies, they change. This is the reality. If we base our worth off of how we look and not off of God who never changes, then we will always be dissatisfied. This world and everything in it changes and fades away. But God, He is eternal. He never changes or fades. If you and I can find our worth and identity in His word and will for our lives, we will discover the confidence we are desperately searching for as women.

We all struggle with jealously and comparison. It’s a battle that we always need to be ready to fight and make the choice on if we will believe lies or truth. But before I gave my life to Christ, I had no sense of confidence at all. It wasn’t until I gave my life to Christ that things began to shift.

When I discovered how much God loves me, cares for me, and sees me, things started to change in my life and in my confidence. I began to develop confidence because I was focused on Him, not on myself. That is the key to being confident and secure in who we are- it’s not finding our worth, beauty or value in ourselves, but in a God who made us and defines us.

In conclusion, I really wanted to share a snippet from a blog by Sadie Robertson. When it comes to beauty she wrote;

“…you look in the mirror and do not feel beautiful do you? The reason you have not recognized beauty when you go to the mirror every day is because beauty was not what you have been looking for… that is why you have been missing it. You were looking for an image the world gave you, and you limited the definition of beauty to the standard the world gave you. The trick to the world’s definition of beauty is an unrealistic standard set to compare and compete, and we always need more or less of something to obtain the standard. It will send you on a journey to obtain this, but you will never really reach it because there actually is not a realistic image to reach. The trends will always keep you feeling like you’ve just missed.  If you hold too tightly to the standards of the world for beauty you will never feel beautiful.  It’s designed to always make you feel not quite there because it’s not real, and it wasn’t God’s design. When God created you, He created a work of art… not meant to be compared to any other form of creation. The image of beauty you were designed to reach is right in front of you. He created a new, original design for the world to get the joy of seeing. Go look around and you will not find one other piece of creation that looks exactly like you. Right where you are you will find all the beauty in the world and understanding this, you will find long lasting contentment.”

Let’s make a choice today- let’s choose to pursue God and His truth and allow that to redefine our definition of beauty. Let’s choose to not feed into the lies of comparison and insecurity. Let’s make a choice to be who God made me to be, and encourage others to do the same.

You are beautiful, my friend. Let’s believe that.  

Melissa SecchiaroliComment